It is coming up on one year since my friend Jordan unexpectedly passed away. I’d like to share a little bit about the Jordo I knew, the impact he had on me, and some thoughts I’ve had this year without him around.
I met Jordan a few months after I moved to Seattle, thanks to the friendship of Kristen and Elise. Jordan welcomed us both with open arms. We all met at a bar, and within minutes Jordan was trying to find an excuse to throw a party to officially welcome us.
That’s exactly who Jordan was. The most welcoming person I’ve ever met. He was always ready to listen, and support, always ready to have a good time, and usually encouraging you to do something ridiculous.
He loved Jesus, he loved his wife and son, he loved working with youth, and he loved his friends and family. I am nothing short of blessed for having gotten the opportunity to know him, no matter how brief our time was.
I love you and miss you jojo.
12-18-1981 to 1-2-2010
my grandma’s house is all cleaned out. only major furniture left. its really sad that all their stuff is gone, and that my dad and my aunt are fighting. i feel so helpless. my dad’s being just sad. he’s seeing a berevement councelor, so hopefully that helps him. i want him to be happy. but i know i am not the person who can do that.
i want to hang out with loren again. i need to meet new people. i guess loren and i are hanging out tomorrow, going to a show or something. the show is kinda bootsie though, maybe we will do something else. after our conversation the other day, i think i understand him a lot better. why he did some of the things he did, etc. i think it will be good for me to have a friendship with him. there’s really no more attraction there, and i’m happy to say it. i’m a different person, he’s a different person, it just might be the right time for friendship. here’s hoping.
i can’t wait for school to start. i miss the bustle.
I WANT TO SCREEEAAAAMMM.
there is so much that i want to say and so much to rant about and vent, etc. but i wont. its all so ridiculous. i feel like i’m the only one who is concerned with everyone. its RIDIC.
hopefully my little break today with adam/jen will be helpful. i’ll at least get to decide what my schedule will be like next semester.
it will all work out. if i need a little stress for a little bit of security, that’s fine by me.
services party today. soooo many people there!! including some random who brought yearbooks with my grandparents in them. how sweet. lots of food. lots of family, and lots of osteoperosis. great day though. people were finally gone around 6.30 and everyone just chilled and napped a bit, then we talked about EVERYTHING. politics, religion, childhood frog stories, etc. i called my cousin, who is the biggest airhead EVER, a goober today, and this whole big thing spawned about her being from another planet, etc. anyways, and we ended up going back to that joke a LOT all evening, and i decided i would write a “lotr” type story involving her being the queen on the planet goober. there was talk of writing because all the old people kept asking me how college was and what was my major, and i kept saying i hate it i want to go to long beach and be a creative writing major. all in all it was an okay day, despite the circumstances. i really love all my family, even though they can get on my nerves. you just need to know how to work them and which buttons not to press.
i have the difficult task of helping my dad and my aunt sort out the estate of my grandparents. like cleaning house and going through personal effects. which will suck basically because there isn’t an inch of that house that isn’t cluttered with something. but could be good because ample time for familial bonding and reminiscing and souvenir scavenging. woot. that doesn’t mean i’m off limits though. so if someone wants to rescue me from this dismal form of torture, gimme a holler.
rest in peace.
Mary Anne Delavan
i saw her yesterday. i am glad. but in this time, i am alone. tim is in los angeles living it up at disneyland, and my mother is not to be reached in oregon. i am on my way to my dad and aunt, but for the last few hours, i’ve been here alone. left to think. its going to be heartwrenching being there. i’m monstrously relieved that she has passed, she was in so much pain. but for my aunt and my dad it is very different to see your mother go. especially when she was all you had left. i want to talk to my mom, but i can’t get ahold of her.
i love you all, in case i don’t say it enough.
i don’t like when people die. i don’t know mg at all…i know who he is. like i saw him around. but that is still terrible.
i don’t know what else to say…i have to go visit my dying grandma today after school. and i should prolly go see the other one that just got out of the hospital. isn’t it fun watching your family crumble right before your eyes? i think so.